194.6 Being In The Fray

You know, when I first started writing this blog I really didn't think that there would be many posts that would not be filled with the glory of my success. I knew that I was on a slow, steady course, but it has been a much bumpier road than I ever anticipated. But therein lies the truth of this blog and the truth of long term weight loss. It does reflect life which isn't always smooth and easy.

I just watched the Americans lose to Canada in ice hockey. I hope the Americans are filled with gratitude for being able to reach this place in Olympic history. We all want success all of the time, but being able to take on a challenge is such a big part of the overall picture.

Yes, I feel frustrated, and yes I wish I could be writing how wonderful it is to be losing weight easily, but it is not easy. On the other hand, I am so grateful for being in the fray instead of sitting around, 50 pounds heavier, and feeling bad because I can't do this. Being engaged in a challenge means I am alive and looking forward to continuing changes.

194.4 You Blew It, Sue

And I know why I blew it! Looking back it is so clear. I didn't take the time to check in with that wonderful inner spirit to ask for help in dealing with the food temptations that I knew would face me at our gathering of dear friends that we designed as a potluck supper. I thought I did okay with most of it so that I wasn't too alarmed.

But after our friends left, I had this huge nagging hunger and then I gave in to it. I ate and before I knew it I had downed about 2 - 3 cups of popcorn, at least 2 tablespoons of peanut butter, and a handful of raspberries. Again, I didn't go binge on favorites, but I just ate like there was no tomorrow. (Obviously I was wrong about that since this is tomorrow!) I think the cheese and crackers, the glass of wine, and the cake with fresh berries and whipped cream, and the slice of bread and the lasagna all played into triggering that hunger. The carbs really do a job on me.

Looking back I could have eaten much smaller portions, foregone the wine, ignored the bread, had more salad, had the berries without any cake or whipped cream and still had a great time. But I just didn't get with the program before our guests arrived. And, we supplied the lasagna and bread. I knew that I had to deal with that ahead of time. But I didn't. So, back to the drawing board, back to no carbs except fruit at night, and embracing that inner voice that so wants me to succeed.

193.8 Ah, To Be Quick!

I feel like I have yammered on a lot this week, but I did want to blog about all of that and I hope there was something for everyone to think about in the last several posts. I'm getting the lingo down. It's about time. You have a blog and you post things on your blog. You don't blog on your blog, like I thought you did. Ah, to be quick! :)

So today's post is simply a wish for a great weekend, success in what ever challenges you find yourself in the midst of, and I'll be back tomorrow!

193.6 Telling It Like It Is

I know! Look at that weight. Maybe, finally, I have waited out the lack of weight loss and things might get moving again. I'm not banking on anything yet, but I sure hope so! I did get on and off twice to make sure I was reading the scale correctly and I did smile - I grinned - when that number reappeared!

I went to a meeting last night on the heels having written my blog yesterday about how I don't cry and someone mentioned that her sister was heavy but that's how her sister's husband liked her to be. He didn't like her thinner because then she was irritable, not as nice, etc.

Here's the thing - when I'm heavy I can be a lot nicer also because I use food and wine to damp down those negative feelings. But are we meant to go through life just being nice, just being agreeable? Isn't it better that we allow emotion to flow through us? How can you be passionate about anything if you can't allow yourself to feel all feelings strongly? I know I never learned that it was okay to cry, or that it was okay to be angry. But all of that is just as important as allowing myself to be happy and joyous. And, with practice, all of us can learn to be comfortable with our emotions so that conflicts with others can be resolved instead of stuffed down. Remember The Archie Bunker Show? I cringe to think of all of the times Archie told Edith to "stiffle" it, and everybody laughed. But it wasn't funny because he was telling her not to be herself. We need to be able to be who we are, with all of our emotions flowing within us. Right? If I didn't believe this, I wouldn't be writing this blog the way I do. If I am mad or sad I try to express that. This is not just a happiness blog and I don't want it to be. I'm working hard to tell it the way it is.

195.6 Need A Good Cry

Did you see how that weight popped up again? I don't know why I am pointing it out, but I'm mad, which is always better than sad and eating to assuage the pain. It just seems so odd that I can lose, let's see 247 - 195= 52 pounds, but I can't seem to lose anymore. I've tried all kinds of food, exercise regimes, hypnosis, and awareness techniques and I just can't seem to keep moving downward on the scale. If I hadn't just bought a new scale, I would probably try that too.

So, I'm working on emotional stuff, again. I haven't really talked about this, but I don't cry. I can get good and angry (just ask Jeff), but tears are hard to come by. I'd think without wine and food to numb out with, I might have some tears, but I don't. I wasn't always like this, but as I was growing up, being brave, being tough was much more highly valued that showing emotion. So, I'll keep working on things and one of these days, that number will start down in earnest.

I'm wondering if there are others who are reading the blog and are heavy, who share this characteristic of not shedding tears. I've joked that I have dry eye. I guess it's not really very funny.

194.2 Moving Into That Space

I love writing this blog and I love the comments. Kathleen always keeps me grounded, the voice of reality and experience. She works hard to keep her health, exercise, and weight all under control while raising her three little boys. And, Prill, my sister, usually makes me smile with her comments. If you didn't see either, look at the bottom of yesterday's blog. I love the yabuts! Both comments ring so true and I really appreciated getting them.

But, I hope everyone will try to move into that space where the hard work and yabuts fade away and that positive voice can be heard. When I am on the elliptical and don't think I can go another "glide", if I hook up with that inner spirit it is as if I can go forever, for a while :). It's amazing!

194.4 Tell Me More

I have frequently been asked this question: How did you start this weight loss? What happened that you were able to take the initiative and begin to change your behavior so the weight started to come off? Now this is a really important question, and I have been doing a lot of thinking about the answer. What happened within me that I finally, after months or years of knowing I needed to lose weight, was able to take the first step and then stick with it?

Today I was having a therapeutic massage and Carole, the wunderkind of massage, said that she knew she was having pain and health issues because of what she was eating and the fact she wasn't getting any exercise. She knew she should change her behavior but she just didn't. After chatting with her about my search for the answer to this question of how you go from thinking about what you need to do to doing it, I think I may have discovered some pieces to the puzzle. You know you need to change because your inner voice/spirit is giving you that information. You hear it - you know it. But then your logical voice pipes up and says but I can't change because... and then you tell yourself all the reasons you can't possibly change and you do nothing. I think that when you make the decision to change, instead of tuning out the inner voice, you welcome it and tune it in at a higher frequency to get rid of the static! You say in effect, "Tell me more. Help me know how to proceed. Be with me as I work to make changes". And, you keep tuning in so that your logical voice can't override your inner voice.

Does this make any sense to you? Have you experienced this or something like it? If you have been able to lose weight, does this ring true for you about how you managed to begin and then stick with it?

This is getting way too long so I will quit now, but I know I'll keep thinking about this and I look forward to your comments.

Cheater's Remorse

Well, I cheated. No I didn't go to McDonald's and load up on fries and a Big Mac, or eat a big piece of pie with ice cream, but I weighed myself, before my week was over. And, it was not a pretty site. I was up over a pound and my spirit was crushed. Now we have to remember that I am continually learning how to master effective weight loss for the long haul. I don't know of a book that has ever been written on this topic because everything out there is about quick weight loss, instant gratification, and I am doing the opposite. But I have to tell you that I was heartbroken that my weight had popped up, again. I thought that if I took away the daily, obligatory weigh in piece that somehow I would lose more weight. I haven't weighed myself since that recent morning because we were away from my familiar scale. But I will weigh myself tomorrow morning and every morning thereafter.

So what have I been doing since I experienced this cheater's remorse? I have been doing a lot of thinking about my behavior around food and have come up with a few ideas about why I am so stuck. First off, I started having a little wine. That's not so bad, but a little wine led to a couple appetizers (if we were with others at their home or ours), which led to eating a little more than half a normal serving of the entree and suddenly there wasn't half to save to take home so why not just finish it this time. I think you see where I am going. A little more here and a little more there and I am in trouble.

I am trying to go back to how I behaved when I started this program. I remember coming out in the morning with a silly grin on my face and in my heart because I had lost a half a pound or more since the day before. That hasn't happened in a long time and I want that back. But I have to change my behavior to achieve that so here I go again. I've let myself down, but am determined to pick myself back up and keep going. Hang in there with me!

Happy Weekend!

I can't believe it is Friday already. Time is flying around here. I think it's because I'm so busy getting my Oh, Susanna jewelry business back up and running. A friend in Tucson has offered to sell my jewelry in her art studio/gallery and I'm really excited about this! So I have dusted off everything, priced it and we'll drive down there tomorrow to deliver it and help her set up a display area for it.

So life is good. In fact it's great. Being busy is a great way to keep my mind off of food. No, I don't miss the weigh in every morning, and I think it has been a good change for me. I am a little anxious about my next weigh in (next Wednesday) because I want it to reflect LOSS! But focusing more on what I am eating rather than numbers may be a good way for me to proceed, at least for a while. I've also been doing more hypnosis as I know that that puts my subconscious mind to work for me to keep my goals clear.

Since we'll be away for the next couple of days, I'll take a little break from the blog. So check back Sunday, and if you don't meet up with me then, I will be looking for you on Monday. Happy Weekend!

Mamma Mia, Here I Go Again!

Remember when I used to write about singing with Willie Nelson as I walked? That does seem like a long time ago. Call me fickle if you must, but I have a new favorite - the soundtrack from Mamma Mia. Today I was in luck. I went to our community center workout room and no one was there! I had the room to myself. So I put the Olympics on the TV and pumped up my Mamma Mia music on my iphone, put my little ear phones in and off I went on the elliptical, singing in full voice! It was more fun, the time, 25 + minutes, flew and it was just great.

How are things going? I was in a big hurry this morning to get out of the house so didn't think much about not weighing myself. I probably ate too much for breakfast, two pieces of Ezekiel toast instead of just one. But I have a new way to eat it. I put light cream cheese on it with fresh berries and that's about half the fat and calories of peanut butter, which is what I used to eat on toast. I didn't get hungry until about 2 and then I had an orange and my favorite flatbread that is low in calories, high in fiber and tastes great. Tonight we are going out again and I am going to rely on my inner spirit and awareness so I don't over eat. I already know what I will order so that "dance" is over.

Today I taught my ESL class and it was quite touching. At a student's request, we spent a lot of time talking and thinking about how you say you are sorry if a friend is troubled. Sometimes you can plan all you want, and then something you never have thought of becomes very important. Life is often very unpredictable! I think that is good!

A Day Without A Salad, So Far

I didn't start the day with salad, not because it wasn't appealing, but I want to mix things up so I won't get tired of it. So I started off with Go Lean Crunch, with Fiber One sprinkled on top followed by delicious blackberries. I am not sure if we are just lucky here in Arizona or if it is available everywhere now, but we do have the most gorgeous and delicious produce compared to what I remember during the winters in Boston. As I was just getting ready to pour my coffee I heard that inner voice saying drink water first! And so I did, 2 cups of water, and then I dove into my coffee. Since we are going out to dinner tonight to celebrate a belated Valentine's Day, I have had just an apple and a Fiber One bar since breakfast and that will be plenty. Is there a Fiber One theme here?

And speaking of mixing it up, I decided to lift weights today instead of walking or doing the elliptical. Big mistake! I thought I knew what I was doing since my physical therapist had had me work with weights, but obviously I had forgotten some important elements. After leaving the gym, as I got out of my car to go into the store, my neck and back gave me a rough time, and I realized I needed a refresher course about using weights before I attempt it again. (Most people won't have problems with weights but my tricky back and neck aren't very forgiving.)

So, onward and downward, I hope. I did miss weighing myself this morning, but didn't spend much time agonizing over it. I pushed the scale out of the way so I can't see it any more. The old out of sight, out of mind trick is at work on several levels in my house.

So one day down in my new regime. Stay tuned!

196.0 A Weight Loss Adventure

What if I develop a salad addiction, having to have one first thing in the morning? I was really looking forward to it as I got up today. I did add about 1/2 cup of kidney beans instead of only 10 which is what I did yesterday. And, I didn't eat anything else until about 2:30 when I was offered a very thin slice of chicken from the deli lady at the local grocery store.

But last night I was ravenous. I don't know what to blame it on and it probably doesn't matter in the overall scheme of things, but I just couldn't get rid of that feeling of gnawing hunger. So I ate oranges, bread, oh I am being so honest here, peanut butter, and I drank a lot of water, but it was "harsh" as my grandson Alex likes to say about anything uncomfortable.

So I am shaking up the regime. You won't see my weight posted next to the title for about a week, which means I won't be weighing every day. It's funny. I fought against that in the beginning and now I am having a hard time giving it up. But instead of focusing on numbers, I am going to focus on eating smaller portions, writing everything down, and listening to my body as I eat each meal. And, getting back into the habit of hypnosis everyday. I guess I did choose a good name for this blog! It is turning into quite an adventure!

195.2 Salad Is Delicious Anytime! But...

Well, I kept waking up during the night, almost like a kid waiting for Christmas morning. Was I really going to eat salad for breakfast? I got up feeling groggy from the missed sleep and asked myself that same question again. Of course I was because I blogged about it. And so I did. I cut up strawberries, threw in blueberries, pine nuts, and kidney beans. I sliced and diced a red pepper, chopped up romaine to add along with some exotic lettuce combo, drizzled on some salad dressing and sat down to eat salad with my coffee. Honestly, it was delicious. I didn't miss my usual breakfast food and I was pretty pleased with myself. However, within an hour I was starving! I'm going to add more kidney beans tomorrow morning.

195.4 Change Is Awkward

A couple of days ago I mentioned the book Born To Run. This may becoming a life changing book for me. We'll see. In it, a nutritionist recommends eating salad for breakfast. Her reasons make sense: salad greens are full of water and are a wonderful way to rehydrate each morning. They are also full of magnificent nutrients. She says you can put almost anything in the salad along with the greens, and you can eat all you want. Fruit, vegetables, nuts (a few chopped), and the salad dressing of your choice does sound good to me. She also recommends adding kidney beans for protein. (Obviously, I won't go crazy with the amount of salad dressing.) I woke up this morning thinking I might try it. This will be a huge shift for this cereal or toast, with fresh fruit gal. But I've been thinking that the only reason I eat that for breakfast instead of salad is because that is the way I was taught. I have changed several things about how I live my life during this weight loss adventure and they have all involved shifts in how I have thought about things and dealt with things all my life, and, they have often felt awkward. So why not totally change what I eat for breakfast? Tomorrow morning I'm going to make myself a delicious salad. I wonder how I will like it.

196.0 Wrong Way, Sue!

I am trying hard to put a positive face on this weight gain of 2 pounds and am having trouble doing that. I have been stuck in the 194 -196 range for about 2 weeks. Come on mind and spirit and body. Let's work together and move forward toward this weight loss goal that I have set. Today I did the elliptical for 24 minutes. If you read my blogs when I first got on the elliptical you know that every minute counts with me. So now I am in the process of refocusing on all my tools - water, exercise, self hypnosis, listening to my inner spirit, being aware and present, eating smaller portions, and eating slowly. Come on, Sue. You can do it.

195.2 A Sight To Behold!

I went to the doctor's office and this very ugly representation of 5 pounds of fat was sitting on a magazine table just begging me to take the picture. My iphone was handy and so I did. What shocks me is knowing that I was lugging around 10 of these. And, now I want to lose about 4 more. If this isn't good motivation, I don't know what is. Yuck! (It is about 15" long, 5" high and 3"-4" thick.)

194.8 Born To Run...Who Me?

My daughter Miranda suggested I read the book Born To Run. When she first told me about it, I dragged my feet :). I know I will never be a runner at this stage of my life. And, if you have been reading my blog, you know that I would never have said that I was born to run. But, according to the book, we were all born to run. The book talks about how complicated and efficient our feet are. Some of us just didn't know how to value that gift as we were growing up. The book is about many things to do with running, but also about the development and endurance of our spirits. And, it's also about healthy eating. It talks about the tribe of the "reclusive Tarahumara Indians of Mexico’s deadly Copper Canyons who are custodians of a lost art. For centuries they have practiced techniques that allow them to run hundreds of miles without rest and chase down anything from a deer to an Olympic marathoner while enjoying every mile of it. Their superhuman talent is matched by uncanny health and serenity, leaving the Tarahumara immune to the diseases and strife that plague modern existence." (I took this quote from the editor's description of the book on Amazon.com.) To eat like these tribe members, the first suggestion was extremely simple: eat less. The second was to eat mostly fruit and vegetables and to rely more on beans for protein than animal products. The concept of eating less does seem simple, but doing it is not as easy as it sounds. However, it wasn't as difficult as I thought it would be and becomes habitual quite quickly. Since my weight loss has really stalled out, I am thinking about cutting back even more. I can always fill up on celery :), apples, other veges. Oh, one thing I do occasionally while I'm preparing dinner so I won't eat while cooking is to put out raw veges. My favorite these days is a sliced red bell pepper, beautiful and yummy.

194.4 A Piece of...Celery!

Just call me the last of the big spenders. I couldn't stand that old scale and don't know when I will see my cousin again, so I did it! I went to Walgreens and bought another $10.00 scale. I really know how to treat myself to something special!:)

I am trying to learn to play bridge and it's really hard to keep all of that in my head! I am wondering if I could hypnotize myself into remembering all those rules and responses! Can't hurt and might help. I do need help!

I realized I was starving by the time I got to Walgreens. Luckily they sold Fiber One Bars there! It tasted great and I think I'll be fine until dinner. Guess what we're having? You got it - fish, asparagus and fresh berries. This is a piece of ...celery!

194.2 It's All About Every Day

You got it! I'm really stuck. This morning I was rushing around thinking I didn't have time to exercise and then I heard that wonderful inner voice say, "Wait a minute! Of course you do if you get going!" So off I went to my workout center and did the elliptical for 23 minutes! I wasn't late to my first meeting of the day and it felt so good that I made the effort especially in light of being stuck!

Today I had an interesting chat with a gal I met at my hair stylist's. She's 61 and is a runner. And, she's always kept her weight down except for a short span of time when she weighed about 10 pounds more than she usually does. She said a couple of things that I thought were really telling - she still writes down the exercise she does every day. (I don't do that and I think I'll start.) Here's another thing she said - that people assume that she is slender because of her genes. She said that she has worked on staying slim and healthy since high school. I know that I used to think that some people were just lucky and didn't have to pay attention to their weight or health. Now I am realizing that it's more likely that those "lucky people" have done what I am trying to do now, and that is be disciplined and thoughtful (conscious and aware) of how I live my life. What's the payoff? Enjoying life and feeling good about myself. Even though my weight is stuck, I am wearing jeans in a smaller size! Wowee!

194.2 How Do You Know, Part 2

I've been thinking a lot about what I wrote yesterday regarding the question about how do you know if it is worth it to lose weight if you are older. I was 66 when I decided I had to get rid of the large amount of weight I was asking my body to drag around. I think I knew that I had reached a now or never place in my life... that I was either going to get with the program and lose the weight or I was just going to get bigger and heavier. And, the stenosis and arthritis in my spine had already made it painful to walk and I was just getting more and more disabled and dependent. But just because I had reached the decision point doesn't mean it's been easy. It hasn't been easy. I loved Kathleen's comment about the cookie that she made on yesterday's post. She wrote, ..."You have to want it more than you want the cookie. All the time. Even when the cookie is right there in front of you." She is so right, and that cookie is always going to be in front of me even when I reach my goal weight. My challenge then will be to figure out how often I can have that cookie without regaining any weight. (But that's another blog:), the one I may write as I am dealing with maintaining my weight.)

Having had time to think about this question a little more, I do think as we get older there are some subtle physical changes that are at work in our bodies that we can be unaware of that can really cause problems as we age, if we are carrying too much weight. As I've written, my issue certainly was my back. All the joints suffer as we age and so even if we think we look okay and feel okay, that doesn't mean that we aren't putting ourselves at risk.

Maybe the answer to this question, how do we know when weight loss is worth the effort, is easy. Maybe the answer is that it's always worth the effort because the weight is never doing any of us any favors. From my own experience, I can say that it is a wonderful kick to be able to get out of a chair, through a small space, or to walk quickly without giving it a second thought, or any thought. Now I just do it because I know I can. And that's a lot more gratifying than eating that cookie.

194.2 How Do You Know?

We had a great time in Prescott. This morning we met my sister and her husband for breakfast and then headed down to Scottsdale. About 30 miles outside of Prescott I remembered that my scale was still at my cousin's house. You know how you get distracted when you are trying to do a lot at once? I remember thinking I needed to get it out of the bathroom, and then I didn't think about it until we were well on our way. I liked having my own scale with me, but now what? I have my old scale that is very fickle and unreliable. But that's what I will use until I get my favorite one back.

My sister and I had a good conversation about when you are older how do you know if it's worth it to lose weight. If you feel pretty good and have no immediate health issues, and even though you may look heavy, what does it take to push you over the line into the place where you take action and commit yourself to new behaviors? I have a hunch if I knew the answer to that I could sell it on the internet and make big money. Any ideas?

194.0 Staying Stuck

I am a little stuck at this weight, but now that I expect to plateau on a fairly regular basis, it doesn't bother me as much. I like this plateau because it is at my lowest weight since being on this program, instead of reaching a low weight and then jumping up a couple of pounds and being stuck there.

So tomorrow is another day. We head home after having breakfast with my sister Barbi and her husband, and guess what? We'll have fish for dinner, with lots of veges and salad. It is amazing how my tastes have changed since I have gotten into this.

194.0 Bring Your Own Scale, Sue

We are driving up to Prescott this afternoon and so I am writing earlier than usual. By the way, if you aren't familiar with Prescott, AZ, it is a wonderful little town full of Old West history and architecture, and it's a great place to visit. Both my sister Barbara and my cousin Steve and their families live there so we have a great time whenever we head up that way.

I always feel a little nudgie when I stay with friends and family. Why? It's all about the food. Even though my Prescott relatives know what I am up to with this weight loss program, it's hard. It's hard because I'll be faced with new food options and therefore challenges. I know I will have a good time, but I need to stay on message, as they say, so that I don't become unaware of what I am eating and how much, etc. So I'll report back, and, the scale will know. There's a thought, Sue. Bring your own scale so you don't have to ask to borrow one. Keep it easy.

I may not blog tomorrow, but maybe I will. As I have said before, you never know with me in charge:) Happy Weekend!

194.0 The Cake Conundrum

Today I went to PVCC to teach my ESL class. Once I arrived in the classroom one of my new students presented me with two slices of gorgeous looking bundt cake. I thanked her and was really touched by her overture. During the two hours that I taught, I would glance over and see the little baggy with the cake in it wondering how I was going to handle this. After class I thanked her once again and went to the kitchen area where I had to sign out. By now it was 12:15 and I had been working hard for two hours, and yes, I was hungry. Maybe you'll laugh, but I asked my inner spirit how in the world I was going to deal with this cake, and I heard that I should taste it, and then decide what I was going to do with the rest of it. So, I took a bite and slowly chewed it. It was delicious. Although I had thought it was simply chocolate and white cake, it was much more. I could taste cinnamon, I could taste nuts, and I could taste orange. And then I knew that one bite was just the right amount. I threw the rest away and haven't thought about it until now.

What's really cool is that in the old days I really wouldn't have even experienced the flavors until I had eaten most of it, if then. I would have taken large bites, chewed it quickly and swallowed it, ready to take another bite. This small bites and chewing slowly way of eating has real benefits!

What makes this way of losing weight different from other weight loss programs is that it is not about depriving myself of any food. I feel free to eat whatever I want, but the questions I always ask are how much do I want it, and how much am I going to eat. It's working!

194.0 Less Is More!

This is really funny to me. I've lost 53 pounds now and I am focused on every ounce, up or down. I've been trying to realize that I have lost a lot of weight, but I don't walk around telling myself what a big deal it is. And, I forget what I used to look like. I remember blogging earlier that I was having a hard time picturing myself slimmer. Now that I'm slimmer I have a hard time remembering how I used to look.

But today I saw a reflection of myself and let's just say, I am so happy I have lost this weight. Less of me is definitely more!

194.6 Exercise As A Habit

In my dentist's office there is a poster that reads,"Twice a day, brush only the teeth you want to keep!" It always makes me smile because it is so simple and yet so important. This morning I was having a discussion with myself about how I was going to fit exercise into my day today. I am realizing that exercise has become an ingrained habit just like brushing my teeth. When I was very little my mom had to brush my teeth for me. As I got older I could do it myself but she would have to remind me. And eventually it was a habit and I would just brush my teeth. I didn't agonize about when I would do it, if I would do it, if I could skip it on a given day. Unfortunately exercise was not a habit that was ingrained in me as a young child or as an older child. Oh, I had gym class 3 times a week through high school, but that didn't involve choice. Once I left that environment and went on to college, I didn't exercise on purpose. I'd walk, but that was just something I did in order to reach another goal, to get to class or the library.

Since I have taken on this weight loss journey, I have had to add exercise to my life and I realize that it has a lot in common with brushing my teeth. By doing it regularly exercising has become a habit. I used to dilly dally around about it but what I learned is that I always have felt great both physically and emotionally once I just did it. I have never finished my walk or left the gym thinking that I wished I hadn't done that. And now it's not a choice I make everyday. It is something I do everyday. The question is not whether I am going to exercise, but what am I going to do and when am I going to do it. This body has gotten more slender, stronger and healthier since I have started exercising daily. And, I want to keep it that way.

195.0 Jumping Up and Holding On

I'm wondering about something.... When I hit a new low, why do I go up about a pound and then stay stuck there for a while. It's an obvious pattern of mine as I look over the past several months of this weight loss program. I wonder if this is a common experience with others who are trying to lose weight or is this one of my very unique eccentricities. Can you have unique eccentricites or is that repetitive? Anyway, what I'm thinking about, with the help of my inner spirit, is that maybe I'm holding on to the weight like I hold on to the "comfort zone" of my past. How much do I really want to lose more weight? How comfortable am I with the idea of losing more weight?

I'm going to work on this with self hypnosis to reinforce the idea in my mind that losing more weight is what I want to do. I would love to hear any thoughts you may have if you are experiencing this same phenomenom.