178.2 Hanging In There

Sometimes I just have to hang in there. After my roller coaster week I went back to the basics of listening to my weight loss CDs made by Jennifer Scott, drinking lots of water, reaffirming in my own mind that I want to get back in the 170 range, and being kind to myself. When I listen to the CDs purposefully, I realize where I have been and how much more I enjoy being slender than carrying around all of that extra weight. That phrase "staying conscious" is so important to my being able to stick with this. I don't really have a choice if I want to live the best life I can. There is no way that gaining more weight back is going to enhance my quality of life, and isn't that what this is all about?

177.2 What A Difference A Day Makes

It is amazing how many changes occur in less than a day in the life of a newborn. She was able to lose 9 ounces and I was able to gain about that.

I just came back from attacking the elliptical. To tell the truth, it was hard today to stick with it. It seemed like I never got in the zone. I've got to get a plan set up so that I can work out while I'm in Boston helping my daughter. Having a schedule and keeping in control of my eating will help me stay conscious, aware of what I'm doing. It is very circular, I've learned. If I have everything in place, things stay in place. If I let things get a little haphazard, it can all fall apart.

And now I have even more motivation to stay fit and more slender. I had three very precious reasons and now I have 4... wonderful grandchildren.

171.2 Reading The Cereal Box

Remember when you were a kid, sitting at the breakfast table reading the cereal box? Well, this morning I found myself reading the box of a new high fiber cereal that Kellogg is promoting! I went to the list of ingredients and couldn't believe my eyes. After counting 20 ingredients and only being about 1/3 of the way through the list, I quit and vowed never to buy this cereal again. Oh, it tastes very good, probably due to all of the additives. But do I really need all sorts of dyes added to my cereal, chemicals for this and that? I don't think so. I took out some other boxes of cereal to compare, and all of them had fewer than 8 ingredients and no dyes. Of course, good, old fashioned oatmeal takes the prize.

I'm more at peace with the weight loss and the beginning stages of maintenance than I have been during these early days of glory :)! It feels less daunting and as long as I stay present and conscious of what I'm eating and keep exercise and drinking lots of water high on my to do list, I'll be fine.

172.8 Is This Fun or What?

Yes, this is making me smile, and no, I don't know exactly why at this stage, I seem to be getting the hang of losing a little faster. I really like the concept of allowing rather than struggling that I wrote about a couple of days ago. I've been keeping that idea in my mind, staying present with it ever since I wrote that post, and I'm happier about so many of the things I do in my life that I used to weigh and measure all the time. I allowed myself to go to a meeting even though I was really tired last night, and I allowed myself to eat salad yesterday without any dressing because I didn't have a choice of a low calorie option, and this morning I allowed myself to use 1/4 cup of oatmeal instead of 1/2 a cup as I prepared it (still adding walnuts and fresh blueberries and topping it with my favorite Carbmaster yogurt (a Kroger product). By the way, it was delicious and filling, and plenty.

And now I am going to work on allowing myself to sleep through the night. I'm facing a bit of a conundrum on this one because maybe I should allow myself to accept that I can't sleep through the night. Let's see how this plays out.

186.0 Can 185 Be Far Behind?

Finally, a new all time low! What changed? I started eating less and I am trying hard to "listen" to my body about when I have had enough. This has been hard for me to pay attention to. I think I am distracted by: how much is left of my plate, will I literally die from hunger pangs if I don't "eat enough", since I exercised a lot I should eat more. Oh, and I am only having salad with salmon or chicken in it so shouldn't I be able to eat a lot more? And the familiar, I have lost 60 pounds so maybe I have lost enough?

No, I haven't lost enough. That new full length mirror has taught me that, and no, I am not consumed with being a perfect size anything. But fat is fat and when I see the collections I am still wearing (these are not fashion collections as seen on some Parisian runway), that is evidence enough. And, my doctors have encouraged me to lose more so this is not all in my head.



This was taken in mid April when I weighed 188. Jennifer has encouraged me to use smaller plates when I serve myself to help me understand the importance of eating less, to get a better visual picture of what that means! So using visual cues, checking in with how I feel as I am eating, staying aware and conscious of what I am eating and enjoying every bite, and keeping my goal in mind, I am on the road again!

203.5 Holidays Happen!

It's Monday on the other side of Thanksgiving and I can't believe I haven't blogged for so long. The blog has become a part of my daily routine and since I have been in Boston with my family, my routine is definitely very different and unpredictable. Tomorrow we head back to Scottsdale and to "my routine".

Speaking of routines, yes, you are already reading ahead of what I have written, my meals haven't been routine, either. What I have learned is that it is hard to keep losing weight during holidays. I have been able to not gain a lot of weight so I am very thankful for that. Probably the most important thing that has happened is that I have stayed conscious/aware of what I am eating, but that doesn't mean I haven't enjoyed some high calorie very delicious food. And, all this has been complicated by going out a lot with friends and family. So what am I trying to say?

Holidays happen with all the food traditions, friends and family. And I want to celebrate that. What will be very different this holiday season is that I won't spend the time between Thanksgiving and Christmas eating like everyday is a holiday and that it's to be expected. In my life now, it is the exception.