170.6 How Did I Do It?

I'm thinking a lot about how I did this, how I lost 80 pounds. Jennifer Scott wants to make a video with me talking about how I did it. First of all, I couldn't have done it without her wisdom, patience, and skill as a hypno-therapist. I wasn't easy to work with. I was pretty stubborn, stuck in my old beliefs about all sorts of things. In other words, I was a hard sell. Opening my mind to her views was work for both of us, thankfully often humorous, but work. We both hung in there together, fastened our seat belts and took every twist and turn on this journey together.

So, how did I do it? The quick answer is one bite at a time. It was one meal at a time, one day at a time, one pound at a time. I didn't just drop 5 pounds here, and 3 pounds a couple days later, etc. This was purposefully slow so that my mind would change along with my body. The quick weight loss diets I'd done earlier had produced weight loss, but no understanding of why I ate what I ate, drank what I drank, and put on that weight. So, it was the mental, emotional work that accompanied the careful eating that made this a very unusual journey.

And then there is the spiritual piece that I hadn't expected but evolved as I worked with Jennifer. She introduced me to the idea that God's power resides in all of us and can be understood once we move our ego issues aside and listen to that voice within us that gives guidance, comfort and support. This played a huge part in my changing attitudes and moving from the old to the new, and I am so grateful to Jennifer for sharing these ideas with me.

I'm still not sure what I'll say in that video, but at least I've got a head start on thinking about it after writing this.

180.6 Why Do I Write? Who Cares?

Why do I write this blog, and who cares? These are questions that have come up several times and they do put me on the defensive, but then I take a deep breath and start to think about the best way to answer them.

Why? I write it because it is a way of making public (and keeping a record for me) all the aspects of what goes into losing a lot of weight employing a totally different approach than most folks use. Having lost and regained 50 pounds twice by using fast weight loss methods, I knew I had do find a way to lose  weight in a way that would hold promise of changing my habits so that I would be able to maintain the weight loss once I reached my goal. I do write it for myself which is why I post my weight every day, but I am also writing it so that those who read it can learn from it and/or just enjoy a real look at all that goes into a slow weight loss adventure. I am committed to helping folks who want to lose weight to make that a reality.

Who cares? Well, according to Google Analytics, there have been 9100 hits from 428 different folks since October of 2009. I don't have that many loyal friends or relatives, and in fact most of them don't read it. People from all over the world have checked it out and it really pleases me to know that perhaps my journey will motivate and entertain them as they travel on theirs.

I also want to say that I have really appreciated the comments both on the blog site and through emails and conversations about how much folks like it.

194.0 Experimenting and Learning

I met with my jewelry making group this morning. It was a very small group this morning but it's always so interesting to see what others are making and how they put combinations together. The differences in taste, the fun of getting to know new people, and to see what they do really makes the class enjoyable for me.

While I'm with them I realize how different we all are and yet how strong the creative spirit is within each of us. When I ask folks if they'd like to join the class, I hear that they wouldn't know where to begin, that they don't have design talent, that they can't draw and therefore aren't artistic. The truth of the the matter is that there is hardly a right way. If I gave the same elements to 5 people, my hunch is none of them would combine them in exactly the same way. The bottom line is that with a little trial and error if it pleases you isn't that all that matters? I can't draw and I have never had art training, but I just keep trying until I get it the way I like it.

I think long term weight loss is a little like that. You have to use all sorts of elements in various combinations that feel right for you and in the end you have to like what you are doing and believe in it. When I started this I had no idea how all of the elements would work for me, and I have done a lot of experimenting and trying new and old things to help me get this weight off. I'm still learning, still trying new and different things (eating salad for breakfast :) ), and returning to some old, familiar tools (keeping a log of everything I eat). But the basics will always be there and knowing that with awareness and being engaged with the process I'll continue to lose is what keeps me going.

208.8 I'll Go Out Walking...

I just came in from doing my water therapy.  While doing it, I was talking on the phone to my friend Barbara who I have known since my UCLA days.  She's the one I wrote about a while back who walks five miles everyday on the beach near her home.  Sadly she hasn't been able to walk since late August because she broke her foot.  And, her foot isn't healing well and there was a lot of frustration in her voice. What really has her upset is that she has gained about 4 pounds and can't seem to lose it because she can't walk.  As she so clearly pointed out, exercise has always been so important to her weight, her health, and her life.

I didn't walk today.  I took the day off, but after hearing her bemoan the fact that she can't walk very easily, I am feeling guilty because I can walk!  I know I don't have to walk everyday and it is okay to take a day off now and then, but I am so happy that I can walk.

I went to PVCC to do my ESL class today and one of the guys who works there complimented me on my weight loss, but more importantly, on how much better I walk and move.  It's funny, because I was never aware of how my walk/gait must have appeared to others before my weight loss, that has enabled me to be more agile.  I knew when it hurt to walk, but I didn't know how I looked when I walked.

So, walking is good, very good, and I will be back out there tomorrow morning, walking and feeling very grateful that I can.

209.6 Doing the Math

Today I feel bogged down.  That is different from being blogged down, and sometimes that also happens.  What am I bogged down about?  I want to get rid of this weight more quickly, which isn't a good thing to be thinking when I am on a slow and steady weight loss program.  But I think it is okay to question where I am in this whole process.  I did the math.  That sentence will make my sister Priscilla smile.  We are always telling each other to "do the math"!

And what did the math tell me?  It told me that I have been losing about one pound per week for about twenty-six weeks.  So, since I started this program in earnest in April, I have lost about 28 pounds. Doing the math, that comes out to just over a pound a week.  It feels slow and on paper, day by day, it looks slow.  But if I tell someone I have lost 26 pounds since April, the response is positive.  And what if someone told you that they had lost 52 pounds last year?  Would you be impressed?

I am sticking with the program and the goal of about a pound a week.  I am happy being me right now, and know I can do it.  By keeping my mind and heart on my goal, I'll reach it one week at a time, one pound at a time.

208.8 A Changed Mind

I have talked a little about hypnosis as a part of this weight loss experience.  The first time I was hypnotized I was a senior in high school and  my cousin Marcia, who had learned to use hypnosis as a tool to study for her PHD thesis orals, hypnotized me.  I had an English paper to write and through hypnosis she gave me enthusiasm for the subject and confidence that I could write this paper.  She also said that I would really enjoy writing the paper.  I remember that I did experience all of those things as I wrote that paper.  When the teacher returned it to me she had graded it with a big red letter A and then wrote "What happened?"  What happened was that I had been empowered by hypnosis!

In the most recent hypnosis CD that Jennifer made for me she says, "You have changed your mind".  This does not refer to dithering, something I have been known to excel in according to my husband.  It has to do with a real shift in how I think about myself since starting this weight loss program.  And this shift, this change in how I view myself is one of the best outcomes as a result of losing the weight.

How has my mind been changed?  I no longer think of myself as someone who is disabled.  I no longer think of myself as someone who is just too old to try something new.  And, I no longer think of myself as fat!  How's that?  Oh yes, I still have a lot of weight to lose and I am very aware of that, but instead of feeling fat and unattractive, I feel thinner, happier,  and confident that I will lose the remaining pounds to reach my goal.

Once again, I was empowered by hypnosis!  Having a changed mind is even better than getting an A on an important assignment.