176.8 Now That's Better

And, my mood is better, even though it is a gray, rainy day here. I watched every mouthful yesterday and drank lots of water and feel much better today. One thing I certainly know is that eating out is a killer because of all of the hidden salt. In one of the places we stayed near Canyon de Chelly our restaurant choices were Burger King, 5 stars, and the Holiday Inn restaurant, 2 stars. There was no really good choice!

I met Jennifer at the Paradise Bakery this morning and she challenged me to think about what my purpose here on earth is all about, why do I think I am here. I think it is a good question for all of us to think about no matter what our age, and I don't have a quick answer. I do think my gifts, if I have any, are that of being a teacher and a mom! And, I think I can be effective as a teacher and a mom as long as I am here. But what am I going to teach? I will certainly continue teaching ESL, and there's no reason why I can't reach out and help others lose weight. I do know all about ups and downs and what works and what doesn't work when it comes to weight loss. I'm going to continue thinking about Jennifer's question and listen to my inner spirit to help me figure out more about my purpose.

175.6 So, Today I'm Tired

I'm tired of being good around food I told Jeff. I'm tired of wanting to drink wine and eat and eat and at the same time not really wanting to do that. I think I am in a serious state of conflict, and, I'm tired.

I woke up a lot during the night, and stayed awake after waking up at around 5 AM. And I had to have a fasting blood draw at 8:30 this morning and then I had to teach at PVCC and then go back down to tutor the Japanese businessman late this afternoon. There's a lot of driving involved when you live a half hour from everything, especially when you are tired.

So tonight, I'll have a healthy dinner cooked by dear Jeff and be in a much better frame of mind in the morning. I'm never at my best when I'm tired.