I know! Look at that weight. Maybe, finally, I have waited out the lack of weight loss and things might get moving again. I'm not banking on anything yet, but I sure hope so! I did get on and off twice to make sure I was reading the scale correctly and I did smile - I grinned - when that number reappeared!
I went to a meeting last night on the heels having written my blog yesterday about how I don't cry and someone mentioned that her sister was heavy but that's how her sister's husband liked her to be. He didn't like her thinner because then she was irritable, not as nice, etc.
Here's the thing - when I'm heavy I can be a lot nicer also because I use food and wine to damp down those negative feelings. But are we meant to go through life just being nice, just being agreeable? Isn't it better that we allow emotion to flow through us? How can you be passionate about anything if you can't allow yourself to feel all feelings strongly? I know I never learned that it was okay to cry, or that it was okay to be angry. But all of that is just as important as allowing myself to be happy and joyous. And, with practice, all of us can learn to be comfortable with our emotions so that conflicts with others can be resolved instead of stuffed down. Remember The Archie Bunker Show? I cringe to think of all of the times Archie told Edith to "stiffle" it, and everybody laughed. But it wasn't funny because he was telling her not to be herself. We need to be able to be who we are, with all of our emotions flowing within us. Right? If I didn't believe this, I wouldn't be writing this blog the way I do. If I am mad or sad I try to express that. This is not just a happiness blog and I don't want it to be. I'm working hard to tell it the way it is.
Thursday, February 25, 2010
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2 comments:
I think that feeling angry or sad is important, but it is just as important to know why. Sometimes I am angry, storming around the house, and I have to take a moment and think about why I'm angry, or why I'm sad.
Feeling the feeling is important, but once I've recognized it, I have to decide what to do with it. Accept the situation? Try to do something about it? GIve it a rest for awhile? Being in the throes of feeling sometimes blocks this important step and becomes simply self-destructive.
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