Today started out to be a very difficult day. My weight has continued to go up and I know why. Last night I totally lost my focus and ate unconsciously and out of control. That really hasn't happened like this in a long time and it bothered the heck out of me that I did it.
This morning when I got on the scale I was filled with anger and disgust at myself about what I did last night. How could I have done that? #*#! happens and it sure happened last night. The good news is that I have been very upset and uncomfortable with the fact I over ate to the extent I did last night. I am determined that this is not going to become a pattern that I can ignore. I am fighting back.
So today I was able to start turning things around, and I spent some time repairing my spirit along with getting back on track. It was made a little more difficult because we went to a dinner party at the home of some dear friends. The hosts didn't know about my experience over the past 24 hours. They were hosting out of town guests who helped them prepare and serve an elegant, delicious meal with lots of healthy options so I enjoyed every bite. It worked out very well and we had a great time.
I'm fessing up because this blog is worthless if I'm not honest about what really is going on with me as I continue to face this challenge that I have given myself of losing 80 pounds. As I have said in earlier posts, it is definitely not an even slide down those numbers on the scale. So I'm back to staying aware of every bite, back to exercise, back to working on being filled with gratitude for my life.
Saturday, April 3, 2010
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2 comments:
I hope you've forgiven yourself. It sounds like you're back on track--what happened is in the PAST. xxoo!
It happens with everybody. There are some bad days and a lot of good days. So hey don't worry and stay happy.
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